I’ve been reluctant to write about this because screen time gets such a bad rap. And for good reason. There’s a lot of stuff out there I would never let my kids watch on a screen or do on a tablet. I kept my eldest away from screens for a long time and only really started allowing her to watch shows after she turned two. It was out of desperation since I’d just had a newborn and was having trouble juggling the two at first. But that stage of crazy parenthood is over and I’m still allowing about 25 minutes of screen time a day now, and I don’t even feel guilty about it anymore thanks to one show: Daniel Tiger’s Neighborhood.
This show is the best. My friend Wilma first recommended it to me as a show that was based off of Mr. Roger’s Neighborhood. Now, I am singing the praises of this show so often that Ben said I should blog about it.
“Oh no, I can’t,” I quickly countered.
“Why not? You’ve told so many other people about it,” he pointed out. That’s usually one of the telltale signs that this topic is blog-worthy.
“Because… well, I don’t want to admit that I let my daughter have screen time almost every day. It’s kind of a teacher blog, you know?”
Or parent blog. Or maybe I just have general please-don’t-judge-me fears. I mean, I’ve even put up posts about the negative effects of excessive technology use… so… screen time isn’t exactly something I want to brag about, right?
But it’s not just any show, guys. It’s Daniel Tiger’s Neighborhood.
When I first let her watch it, I plopped down next to her and did that attentive parent thing and watched the whole thing with her. It wasn’t too bad, actually, and I found myself enjoying the show and humming along with the songs. This first episode showed birthday boy Daniel excitedly getting his birthday cake, only to find it smooshed when he arrived home with it. He’s disappointed, but his dad empathizes with him then suggests, “When something seems bad, turn it around and find something good!” They discuss the cake and decide that hey, it still tastes yummy. Then Daniel says, “I’m not disappointed anymore! I feel better.”
Cool, I thought, but totally unrealistic. As if you can really just tell a child to turn it around and find something good, and everything’s okay! But I kept that skeptical attitude in my head and let positive things flow out my mouth, like, “Oh, that was so disappointing, but Daniel was able to find something good! Mmm yummy cake! What a great attitude! Have you ever felt disappointed?”
We talked about it and recognized how Daniel had to try to find something good to focus on, and ways that we could do this in our lives, too.
Maybe this particular lesson didn’t make an impact on us, but since then, many other episodes of Daniel Tiger have! Here are some things that have happened:
- I was in the gated playroom with my son, and my daughter went off to her art area to draw some pictures. The whole time, I heard her singing softly to herself, “Making something is one way to say I wuv you… making something is one way to say I wuv you.” A few minutes later, she came running into the room, “MAMA I MADE THIS FOR YOU!”
GUYS SHE LOVES ME - Toys are ALL OVER the place ALL THE TIME. But at least we can sing a happy little working song while we do it now, to the tune of, “Clean up, pick up, put away, clean up everyday!” It’s so positive and happy and until I show her Enchanted, this one is my new go-to clean up song! (And this one, but it’s kinda played out over here so it was refreshing to have a new ditty!).
- Then there was the time I saw my little girl get upset. I was bracing myself for it when she suddenly stopped, held her little hands out and said to herself, “When you feel so mad that you want to roar, take a deep breath and count to four.” She took a deep breath, then exhaled: onetwothreefourfive.” We’re working on the counting to four part, but I’m still gonna call that a WIN. Daniel Tiger for the WIN. And yes, she did really calm down after that. SHE’S TWO, PEOPLE. SHE’S TWO AND THE LITTLE SONG WORKED.
Of course the downside is that when she makes me mad, she always advises me to simply take a deep breath and count to four… and I have to walk the walk too, right? I guess it’s not really a terrible downside, but I’ll admit that I do it while casting mental side-eyes at Daniel Tiger’s perfect mom. - “You can take a turn, and then I’ll get it back.” This is a lot more concrete to two-year olds than “Share.” This has clear instructions and gives a picture of the actions involved in sharing. I expected my daughter to have a much harder time sharing her toys with her now-mobile baby brother, but it actually hasn’t been bad at all, and I give DT some credit for that! She also sings that in preparation for playdates at our house, too. It’s cute. But more importantly, it’s effective!
I could keep going. She sings a sad song to feel better, thinks about other people, helps friends, apologizes, talks about being safe. There’s even an episode about other people being similar and different to each other, which gave me a great starting place to talk with her about people with disabilities. It’s like a musical living with this little girl, and she’ll spontaneously bust out in relevant and catchy ditties from the show ranging from, “I like you, I like you, I like you just the way you are” to “Rest… is best!” and almost every time, I sing an inner “AMEN!” to that and high five Daniel Tiger and his creators (especially when it convinces her to nap!).
So the show has great messages, but is it really effective? Well, I just gave a bunch of examples showing how it has been effective for my two year old, but as a teacher, I also think they’re doing a good job actually teaching these messages. If you’ve read any of my behavior related posts, you know that I’m all about rehearsing desired behavior. I think one of the most effective ways to rewire kids to stop unwanted behavior and start a new positive behavior is to give realistic context and practice it the right way until it’s second nature to them. That’s how this show is set up. There’s a problem, someone teaches the character how to approach it, and then they have a few opportunities to practice it.
The adults in the show are great at keeping their cool, validating the kids’ feelings, and offering practical and (mostly) realistic advice. I also appreciate that adults are portrayed as capable, wise, and compassionate vs. the goofy, airheaded, and out of touch parents I’ve seen on some kid shows and movies out there.
Before, I thought I was doing a pretty good job of teaching my daughter about emotions and helping her develop good social skills, but these days I’m always sure to listen in on her Daniel Tiger shows to see what gems of wisdom I can pick up. The adults in his life are chock full of age-appropriate advice packaged in clever and catchy songs, and I’ve borrowed their material on more than one occasion with my daughter. I’m not saying we should all go and let our kids loose in front of the screen, but I’ve found material from Daniel Tiger to be actually beneficial. And as with most things, it’s okay in moderation, right? 🙂
Also, I’m curious to know: What are some wholesome, positive, beneficial shows you have come across?
3 responses to “Why Screen Time Has Been GREAT for My Child”
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There is a wonderful app called Screen Time that is excellent for helping control your child(ren)’s screen time. You can set how much time, which apps, what time of the day, etc. You can even set up “tasks” that allow your child to earn extra time.
The newer Strawberry Shortcake episodes/movies are good. Strawberry is always considering her friends’ feelings when she’s making decisions.
Dinosaur Train is great too.
These two and Daniel Tiger are my Netflix go-to’s for the littles in our house
Thanks for your recommendations! We have moved onto Dinosaur Train and she LOVES it! 🙂 Looking into Strawberry Shortcake now!